Police Department Replaced with Teen Sleuths
April 9, 2015
Filed under Satire
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Barnstable High School’s forensics class does more than you know. With student career-readiness a big issue for everyone but students, the Barnstable Police Department and BHS staff thought the best way to give students a bigger role in their school was to implement CSI: BHS.
All the petty crimes and pathetic fights in the school needed to be solved somehow – and having the forensics class do it was not only the most cost-effective way, but is guaranteed to help bring the student body together. It builds spirit.
Unless you have been paying close attention, you probably haven’t seen all of these clear signs that the forensic class has been up to something: the discrete rubber gloves in their back pockets, the constant dismissals from class, the rolls of caution tape in their bags. Recently, they even had fingerprinting activity for “homework” so that administration can have all of our prints on the record for solving later crimes. Beware when one of them asks for help with their assignments.
BHS’ school resource officer has also been known to hand over his squad car keys to those select forensics students who, at the very least, have their driving permits. Students patrol the grounds while banking driving hours.
While this class may interfere with all of BHS students’ Constitutional rights, it is a money-saver in the budget and it’s a great influence on B2B tv’s newest premier, NCIS: BHS. Be sure to tune in.