After the tragic pileup of ten eighth graders last week, Barnstable High School has taken severe precautions in order to improve on hallway traffic. Traffic lights, stop signs, and road surface marking will be placed in the BHS halls by next month.

“I think it’s dope personally. The rainbow staircase during passing time is like a scene out of ‘Jurassic Park.’ I swear I age 30 years when going down those steps. I wouldn’t be surprised if I have a gray hair or two,” said second time sophomore, Tim Terry. 

BHS is deciding to combat other hallway violations such as running in the halls, slow walkers and people who flat tire (the viscous act in which one steps on the back of your shoe) with tickets or fines up to $10. Loss of privileges will also be in effect. Examples of this include no cookies or vitamin waters for a week. 

“I think it’s a terrible idea! This is a high school, not Route 28!” said freshman Aria Brown. The school board believes this is the best way to tackle hallway congestion. According to inaccurate statistics, over 20 students have complained about shoulder pains after being severely jabbed in the hallway just last week. It seems like this is the perfect solution to this ongoing issue. Students at BHS deserve safer hallways and with everyone naturally gravitating towards certain spaces in the school such as the rainbows stairs over others, it’s about time we take true action, according to school board director John Jackington. 

“I mean I don’t think that it’s really necessary. Other staircases and hallways exist, it’s about time we use them.” said senior Ryan Raider.

So next time you think of speeding in the halls, smacking the top of a door for absolutely no reason or even just walking so slow you’d make a sloth jealous, just know we all have to walk in those same hallways, before we need a license just to walk. Who knows, maybe one day the school will contemplate adding a parking meter by the lockers to determine how long one should stand by their locker; hey, the idea is definitely up for grabs.