Allow me to set the scene: it’s a muggy, Tuesday morning. The vomit-colored walls of BHS glisten under the fluorescent lights above and the aroma of AXE body spray and broccoli wafts through the hallways. 

Couples, intensely in love, declare their adoration for each other with vacuum-powered make-out sessions against the lockers and with embraces so tight that only the shrill bell announcing the end of the 6-minute passing time can tear them apart. With tearful goodbyes, they head their separate ways, only to make it to class and immediately text “ilysm BAE” with a copious amount of kissing emojis. They’re young, they’re in love, and they’re displaying their affection very, very publicly.

After witnessing an interaction this intense, I usually feel like vomiting (which would coordinate quite nicely with the decor) because it’s so unbearably uncomfortable to observe the juxtaposition of sexually charged students in a school environment.

I understand that, when in a relationship, the excitement of new love is a fantastic feeling that can quickly become addictive. And perhaps your partner is the only reason you’re able to make it through the day, so of course you enjoy your time together. But frankly, overt and extreme PDA, public displays of affection, are obnoxious and incredibly uncomfortable for everyone around. (I have no idea how someone can make out with such passionate vigor while their history teacher awkwardly pretends not to notice from across the hall.)

There are definite degrees and levels of PDA. A little peck is completely different than sucking face with the intensity of a newly-charged Roomba. And there’s a cute, subtle hug, and there’s a frantic mess-of-limbs grope session that the couple treats as their last encounter before weeks of separation (when, in fact, their love story will continue in exactly one hour after AP World History).

I don’t have a problem with little signs of a relationship. In fact, it can be endearing to see a couple so happy and joyful together. But when things elevate to the eyebrow-raising, throat-clearing, uncomfortable next level, that’s when I feel the urge to take out my soapbox. If PDA borders on sexual, it’s poor social conduct, it’s unacceptable for a school environment, and it’s unpleasant for everyone.

A couple of weeks ago I was heading to my French class when I realized I had to make a pit-stop at my locker. Of course, right in front of my locker, a young boy and girl felt that that was the opportune place to clasp each other and go at it without a care in the world. I was then confronted with the dilemma of whether to say something and disrupt their love fest or to just forget my folder and slink away to class.

Luckily enough, after a couple seconds of nervously shifting back and forth and clearing my throat multiple times in desperate hopes of catching their attention, a teacher walked by and asked if they could “separate and just get to class.” They pulled apart at a glacial pace and the girl gave a gargantuan, earth-shattering eye roll directed at the teacher. As they went their separate ways, the boy swore at the teacher under his breath and turned around for one last, loving glance at his 16-year-old sweetheart.

Not only did this disruptive encounter upset me because I was late to my class, but I was confounded at how the kids felt they had a right to be rude to the teacher. If anything, I expected them to be mortified. But, instead, they were disrespectful towards the teacher and acted as if she was in the wrong. When, in fact, the BHS handbook states “reasonable restraint will be used in the public display of affection.” Resulting consequences can include a conference with a teacher and/or disciplinary, detention, or 1-3 demerits. The teacher was actually doing them a favor and instead of being gracious, they were the exact, angsty teenage stereotype that all the rest of us are trying to shed.

I’m not saying all touching should be banned completely. It’s been proven that human contact can to lead to healthier lifestyles. A study at the University of North Carolina observed that women who hugged their partner, even for 20 seconds, had lower blood pressure. Touching has been proven to helped stabilize mental states, calm nerves and even strengthen the immune system. Contact is a key part of human nature and, of course, you want to touch someone you care about; but there needs to be boundaries while in school and kids need to respect them.

I’m not going to go around with a ruler and make sure couples stand five inches apart at all times, like a middle school dance chaperone. I get it, you’re in love, you’re excited. But when I’m at school, the last thing I want to do is navigate around two hormone-crazed 15-year-olds, practically falling down the rainbow stairs because they’re so swept up in the throes of passion. So please, just quietly hold hands and move along.