It’s time for us to realize that silence is not passive. It is not safe, kind, nor forgiving. There is no gray area. If you are not fighting for women, you are fighting against them. Now is the time for us to fight together.

On March 23, a 22-year-old man murdered 6 UCSB students and injured 13 others. Before killing himself, the murderer released a video stating his reasoning. His words are a flawless display of gender inequality: “I don’t know why you girls aren’t attracted to me, but I will punish you all for it. It’s an injustice, a crime.” This man expected them to give him sex because he deserved it. When they didn’t, he killed them.

Even though this reasoning should be shocking, it isn’t. Our society is built on misogyny, the systematic hatred of women. From birth, women are persuaded that we must be perfect. These pressures slither out from the media, from past and pop culture, even from the mouths of those we trust the most. We must be sexy, but not slutty. Skinny, but not too skinny. We have to be pretty, but wearing a lot of makeup means we’re trying too hard. Women have to want children, but the timing has to be perfect because young mothers are a disgrace, and old mothers are taking risks. We are the ones who travel in groups, who carry our keys between our fingers at night. We receive pepper spray as gifts, learn to scream “fire” instead of “rape” because no one comes running if you scream the latter. We must take catcalls as compliments, and tie up our hair so men won’t have a chance to grab it. We accept fear as a protector even though we know it is an oppressor. Women also learn one important lesson: it is always, always our fault.

On May 24^th, a powerful movement started on Twitter, spanning the globe. Egged on by the UCSB shooting, women began to share their experiences with misogyny and sexism.  They began to put their fears and their precautions, their horror stories and their hopes for the future, on display for everyone to see. All of this was achieved using the hashtag #YesAllWomen.

But let’s backtrack for a second and talk about feminism. For many people, that word has a negative connotation, painting a picture of man haters or female supremacists, forging a dumbed-down threat out of an equal rights movement. The prejudice is ingrained so deeply that I have met feminists who refuse to acknowledge themselves as feminists. Take a second to look at your own ideas. Do you believe women should have human rights? Do you think all genders should be treated equally? Are you enraged that girls around the globe are unable to receive an education? That over 200 were taken from their homes and families for pursuing an education? Are you upset that male sexual and domestic abuse victims are not taken seriously because these problems are deemed women’s problems? I hate to break it to you, but you might just be one of us. Your official badge will be mailed to you in 3-5 business days. Be responsible, and please remember to be intersectional.

The easiest way to ignore sexism is to pretend that you are not involved. When feminists point out gender based injustice and violence, the initial response is “not all men are like that.” Alright, you got me. Not all men rape, not all men disrespect women, not all men catcall and not all men go on murderous rampages because they are not romantically or sexually satisfied. But enough do. This is where the hashtag comes in. Not all men are violent towards women, but #YesAllWomen face violence from men. Over a million tweets were posted in less than a week. I’ll give you a few examples.

#YesAllWomen because my outfit is NOT an invitation. #YesAllWomen because her being drunk is a condemnation, while his being drunk is an excuse. #YesAllWomen because we teach our daughters how to avoid being raped, instead of teaching our sons not to rape.

I cannot begin to explore the complexity of these voices; I encourage you to check out the tweets on your own. Of course, countless men spoke out against us. But let’s not focus on the bad. Through this hashtag, many mens’ eyes were opened to the violence women suffer. Gentlemen, women are more than your daughters and your wives, your sisters and your mothers. We are our own people. Voices have been raised, and although we still have a long way to go, we have proven our ability to band together and open eyes. Call me hopeful, but a Twitter trend today forecasts that gender equality could be part of our tomorrow.